Sometimes life surprises us and we end up not getting what we want for work, for love, for recreation. Sometimes we settle, I have settled. I am not sad about it, I just put my head down and forge ahead. I take care of my family and home. I am also the caregiver for my mother who has been disagnosed with Alzhemiers. She is strong willed, and educated but can no longer drive, pay her bills, feed herself (keep food in the house), and medicate herself.
I have become a mother to my mother. After raising (3) kids, I am now on duty 24/7 for her.
The most difficult part is that she still beleives that she can take care of herself. However she has proven over and over that she can not. She has no friends; her life was my father and her sisters who live 3 and a half hours away. She totally isolated herself after my father died 11 years ago. She doesn't want to go to the Senior Center. When I do manage to get her there she doesn't share in conversations, I end up being the one talking with the other seniors.
So how do you entertain someone who just wants to go shopping (her favorite hobby) and is unrealistic as to what we can afford. How do you explain to someone that you now keep her credit card so she won't run from home to spend money and get lost? She is not frail, she walks her dog around the neighborhood everyday. She returns home because she has no money. Now she is angry with me and calls me rude names and claims all I want is her money. She becomes beyond reason, she can not reason. She is a unique individual, she was beautiful comparable to Natalie Wood, she always got what she wanted and now she doesn't. Indeed a challenge, can I really do this I ask myself everyday.
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